My mind feels very alert for the first time in a long time. I'm having the greatest break and I don't want to go back to school. Here's a little outline and re-cap.
The Used. I'm about to get my sixteen year old band tees out and JAM!
I totally skipped out on philosophy like usual to go out for St. Patties. It was lame, only because I really hate being surrounded by Sheboygan's finest, and running into all the people I don't like.
Friday I went out again, danced until 2:30 AM, sober, went to Jalisco's where a fight broke out, and drove behind a drunk man walking home. I worked at 8 on Saturday, awesome. I went home on Saturday, at home-cooking and snuggled in my p-jams watching movies with my family.
Sunday I hung out with someone from my past. Its so bizzare to know how they affected my life in such unimaginable ways. And they have moved on, off this pedistal that I thought would never break. They are the reason my imagination peaked, I listened to strange music and read strange books. The reason for a lot of things. I've been thinking about it all week, trying to shake it, but I can't.
Tuesday I hung out with my friends from high school. They seem successful, engaged to pre-meds, internship in Scotland... etc. I'm here.
Thursday I went shopping, got my first pair of really high hooker heels. I will never wear them, since I am naturally 5'11'' . We went out and I was the most hystarical night I've had in forever.
Tonight I"m going out for a friends birthday, and I'm just going to enjoy the fact that I'm broke and 21. I'm going to enjoy that tomorrow is the day before I go back to school and I still have crazy amounts of homework to catch up on. I'm not going to enjoy any of this tomorrow.
Shit.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Mhmmm
I'm really not looking forward to this week of neurotic bullshit, but I'm going to stay calm. I just have to work really hard to get back on track and all will be well.
I'm listening to Silverstein, feeling these huges waves of nostalgia.
I'm reading Eating Animals by Johnathan Safran Foer, and I only got to dinner without eating meat. I think there's really only two extreme sides to vegetarianism: either you're all for it, or you think its extremely stupid. And honestly I know its wrong for a lot of different reasons, but I've been half-heartedly trying for years to quit meat and I just can't seem to do it. My first excuse is being anemic, my second is knowing that's its completely engraved into me, being an American we never really know different. I could get into this more, but I probably shouldn't.
I'm dvr-ing a show about dinosaurs, don't make fun of me.
I'm drinking rolling rock, no I'm not an alchy..
I'm eating cottage cheese, weird.
Switching to Chiodos.
Painted my toes green and glow in the dark for St. Patties!
Super excited to go out Thursday.
I'm seeing Elvis Costello May 15th, with my mom!
Every year I wait for the first day that I hear birds when I wake up, and today was that day, SPRING!
The end.
I'm listening to Silverstein, feeling these huges waves of nostalgia.
I'm reading Eating Animals by Johnathan Safran Foer, and I only got to dinner without eating meat. I think there's really only two extreme sides to vegetarianism: either you're all for it, or you think its extremely stupid. And honestly I know its wrong for a lot of different reasons, but I've been half-heartedly trying for years to quit meat and I just can't seem to do it. My first excuse is being anemic, my second is knowing that's its completely engraved into me, being an American we never really know different. I could get into this more, but I probably shouldn't.
I'm dvr-ing a show about dinosaurs, don't make fun of me.
I'm drinking rolling rock, no I'm not an alchy..
I'm eating cottage cheese, weird.
Switching to Chiodos.
Painted my toes green and glow in the dark for St. Patties!
Super excited to go out Thursday.
I'm seeing Elvis Costello May 15th, with my mom!
Every year I wait for the first day that I hear birds when I wake up, and today was that day, SPRING!
The end.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
New laptop's name is ... Morris
I probably won't get credit for this two day late post, but I'm going to write it anyways.
Let's start with, I'm super crabby. I have no intellegent information to share with you, so stop reading if that's what you think you'll be getting from now on. I don't know how to write blogs like that, I never have. Occaisionally you will hear about something I deeply care about, but I hate sounding either stupid or pretentious, I'd rather sound narcisistic.
Okay, but why is Marissa crabby? Because, I work, I go to class, I do housework, and then homework. Every single day of my life. Nothing is ever good enough though. There is always dishes in the sink, there is always someone I forgot to spend time with, there's always an assignment I did half-assed. Sometimes guilt consumes me, and I don't know how to be an organized over-achiever who gets ahead. I make longer than necessary lists of absolute crap that needs to get done, but never usually does. I hate being an adult, knowing I haven't been very adult like thus far.
Okay, the guilt part. I double book my entire life because I want to see multiple people, while doing homework, while running errands, while cleaning, while doing things for myself, and so on and so forth. I think I could get it done, but I take a single weekend and don't do all the things I had planned.
Let's take this weekend for example. I worked, I drank, slept, worked, slept, drank, slept, bought a $900 laptop, drank, got introduced to a very attractive young man, which made me drink more, and went to work at 5:30 AM monday morning with.. you guessed it, a hangover from hell.
As I sit here and continuously complain about my lack of ambition, I'm staring at a pile of dirty laundry, piled up math homework, and my roomate watching TV. Now you'd think I'd chose one of the first two to do, but I really don't think I will. Because I am crabby now that I'm so behind. I am ridiculous.
Let's start with, I'm super crabby. I have no intellegent information to share with you, so stop reading if that's what you think you'll be getting from now on. I don't know how to write blogs like that, I never have. Occaisionally you will hear about something I deeply care about, but I hate sounding either stupid or pretentious, I'd rather sound narcisistic.
Okay, but why is Marissa crabby? Because, I work, I go to class, I do housework, and then homework. Every single day of my life. Nothing is ever good enough though. There is always dishes in the sink, there is always someone I forgot to spend time with, there's always an assignment I did half-assed. Sometimes guilt consumes me, and I don't know how to be an organized over-achiever who gets ahead. I make longer than necessary lists of absolute crap that needs to get done, but never usually does. I hate being an adult, knowing I haven't been very adult like thus far.
Okay, the guilt part. I double book my entire life because I want to see multiple people, while doing homework, while running errands, while cleaning, while doing things for myself, and so on and so forth. I think I could get it done, but I take a single weekend and don't do all the things I had planned.
Let's take this weekend for example. I worked, I drank, slept, worked, slept, drank, slept, bought a $900 laptop, drank, got introduced to a very attractive young man, which made me drink more, and went to work at 5:30 AM monday morning with.. you guessed it, a hangover from hell.
As I sit here and continuously complain about my lack of ambition, I'm staring at a pile of dirty laundry, piled up math homework, and my roomate watching TV. Now you'd think I'd chose one of the first two to do, but I really don't think I will. Because I am crabby now that I'm so behind. I am ridiculous.
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